I am an advocate of defense of marriage. But to me it does not seem a good strategy to try to defend marriage (or marriages) by being preoccupied with the private sexual behavior of a small minority of people.

I wish Christians (and churches and voters in general) could quit worrying so much about a few real or imagined homosexual activities going on somewhere and start worrying much more about the health of real marriages in our own churches and families. This would be much more productive, and much more honest, than most current “defense of marriage” activity. It would also be much more valuable than voting for candidates or legislation solely on the basis of this issue. Marriage IS a major issue, but gay activities are of little impact compared to what is going on (or not going on) in many heterosexual marriages.

If we put as much energy into

  • investing in our own marriages and marriages within our churches,
  • increasing faithfulness, friendship, courtesy and responsible behavior within our own marriages,
  • reducing sports obsession (and other time- and money-eating obsessions),
  • reducing porn addictions
  • or helping helping alleviate extreme financial pressures and overcome financial ignorance or irresponsibility in our churches and homes

we would be doing much more to defend marriage than is currently being accomplished with all the anti-gay agitation.

This is very serious. I’m not promoting any “homosexual agenda” or “homosexual lifestyle.” I’m saying that if we care about the health of marriage we should put the energy and effort FIRST into the marriages we live in or are close to. Any other course starts quickly to smell of political dishonesty and manipulation and religious hypocrisy.

Further, obviously, people who are practicing homosexual behaviors (or other sexual practices that are outside Biblical standards), or who have close friends or family members who are involved in such practices, need to be especially careful to avoid dishonesty or mean-spiritedness in their conversations or activites related to this issue.

Jesus did not say that the woman brought to him (in John ch8) was blameless. But Jesus DID insist that she be punished only when “he who is without sin” would cast the first stone. Jesus, if our take on him is right, was the only one there who was without sin. BUT HE REFUSED to pick up a stone to punish her. Then, AFTER he publicly embarrassed her accusers and they all left, he told her, “Go, and sin no more.”

That is a very helpful example of moral activism!